Grandpa Durbin

My grandfather passed away suddenly last night, though he had been sick with prostate cancer for quite some time. He was a tough man. You actually believed him when he would say "I used to walk 5 miles, uphill in the snow to get to school." My relationship with him was uneasy. Alcoholism unfortunately got the best of him more often than not, and created some chaos and damaged relationships in my family. Still, he was trying to make amends in later years and my Dad especially had grown closer to him recently and urged my brother and I to spend more time with him. He knew how much I wanted to start a family and was so happy for me when Sam arrived. That's my Dad, the only son & oldest child, in the picture below.



My Dad wrote all of us a note today with some interesting history about Grandpa Durbin:
Born 4/29/1927 in Devils Lake ND
Served as Radio man in the US Air force from 1945 - 1947. Stationed in Hiroshima shortly after the fall of the atomic bomb.

Married to Clara Belle Winchester on April 29, 1950 in Eugene Oregon. First born Gregory Ross Durbin born in Eugene on 3/8/1951. A sister Debbie followed born in Eugene. Three daughters followed after the family had moved to Great Falls Montana: Rebecca Ann (died 11/5/1987), Diane, and Janet.

Jerry worked some years in the HVAC industry in Great falls, before starting his own shop. He also owned a sea food restaurant, The Seven Seas, in Great Falls which in retrospect, was not a good idea in beef loving Montana.The family moved to Tacoma Washington in 1966, where Jerry worked for National Blower, before he again struck out on his own, and started his own shop.

Jerry grew up on a small farm in North Dakota during the dust bowl and depression years. The family struggled at times to keep food on the table. His farther was forced to kill a cow that he had leased from a local banker. When the banker demanded to know why the cow had been killed and butchered, Jerry's father told him that the family had to eat, lease be damned. The family were devout Catholics, and during the winter months, hitched a horse to a covered sled with a wood stove inside for warmth, and drove to church.

Until the late thirties, they did without mechanized farm equipment and electricity. Jerry's grandfather was a well of farmer who installed the first electric lighting in the county. Powered by large lead/acid batteries in the barn, they were the wonder of the neighborhood. A trip to a restaurant was a treat. Once a year after they sold some of the produce that they grew on the farm in town , they enjoyed a hot beef sandwich in a local cafe. Barn dances were a relief from the hard work and tedium. Jerry and his brother Bob, loved to go together. They danced until midnight, when the dancing stopped for coffee, and not infrequently fist fights between rivals for a lady's attentions. After the coffee and the scuffles, the dancing continued until almost dawn. Jerry and Bob would arrive home to find their father waiting for them in the barn with their work coveralls. They got out of their finery, put on the coveralls and put in a full days work.

The family traveled to Washington following the apple harvest. They earned scarce hard cash picking the apple crop. Jerry learned the habit of hard work on the farm. He worked hard his entire life to provide for his family. His reach sometimes exceeded his grasp, but when he failed, as several business he started did, he dusted himself off, and started again. He and his wife Clara could be generous to a fault. A book keeper who kept the books for him in Montana asked for a loan so he could visit his mother in Arizona. Jerry and Clara loaned him the money, and never heard from him again.

In his latter years, he could be a delightful companion. He was a favorite at the nursing home where he spent his last years. Joking with the staff, admonishing the ladies who complained too much about the food, and making new friends. He wanted to take one of the nurses out to dinner, and protested when he found out that the nursing home rules did not allow it.

A famous movie quote is apropos to his last days: "get busy living, or get busy dying." Jerry got busy living.